SpouseTales Snippets 5: Getting Up And Doing It Again

In Diagnostics, Embracing Coworkers, Impacting Patients, She's a Dentist, She's a Heroine, She's an Entrepreneur by JoAn Majors, RDA, CSP®

Jackson Browne said it best, “…I’ll get up and do it again. Amen!”

My husband and I both love this line out of the old Jackson Browne song, The Pretender. It is a constant reminder that the only thing we can be in control of is our attitude about the great, or not so great, things happening in our life at any moment. Do you have high expectations of those you share your work life with? In Chuck’s four practices we have had staff, team, colleagues and even some true stakeholders.

It seems some days all we want is for the people we share our day with to strive to be the best that they can be for our patients or in my case our audience.

We have had a tough time recently filling a couple of positions in the practice. The work pool where our current practice is located quite frankly isn’t the best around. The GREAT ones are loyal and stay where they are. The GOOD ones won’t move without a great package (and offer a comment like, “don’t call my current employer because he/she doesn’t know I am looking”). The AVERAGE ones are only there until they get a perceived better deal in any healthcare space and this group often has no clue what loyalty looks like on a team. Sounds crazy, I know.

Sometimes I can’t believe the less than respectful communication. The day when you find out a key team member is leaving your office because you read something…oh, let’s say their spouse’s resignation on the front page of the local paper, while your office is closed for a holiday week! Maybe it’s a disappointing text that says, “doctor, you’ll need to reschedule my patient’s for tomorrow” on a Sunday night. It comes only after you reached out since you hadn’t heard anything since the previous Wednesday night. That’s when you were told the individual needed, “some me time”.

This stuff is straight out of the twilight zone!

Then out of true concern for the person and YOUR PATIENTS, you reach out to the spouse to make sure all is okay because you have little to go on. Then it happens, you get the message, “Doctor, it’s Father’s Day!” All I could think was, no kidding Sherlock, it’s Father’s Day at my house too, or at least it was. Now, we have 8 people we’re concerned about and OUR RESPONSIBILITY NEVER ENDS. This is the part no one writes or talks about much.

Literally, where is OUR “ME” time now people?  

I’m sharing this not to be a Debbie Downer but actually quite the contrary. It’s to celebrate that although we have had some not so great experiences, we have enjoyed SOME STELLAR STAKEHOLDERS in our circle, on our team and in our careers. I think we got spoiled by these individuals who were respectful, steady in their career and diligent in their love and learning of dentistry. We understand that not everyone (actually VERY few) have the responsibility of the doctor and “bless their hearts”, the spouses that SHARE THE SPACE AND THE LOVE OF DENTISTRY with them.

My husband and I might have a rant about something like this. We do, however; have an agreement that protects both of us, we can’t both rant at the same time or for the same reason. If I can see clearly, he is in a tailspin over something out of control, I’ll put on the breaks and zip my lip! Then vice versa happens, if he can sense that I’m gonna blow a gasket it is he, who will pour the glass and pray for me! 

I watched the movie Breakthrough recently. There is so much hope, if it’s what YOU LOOK FOR and focus on.

There was a quote by President LBJ. It went like this, “Yesterday is not ours to recover but tomorrow is ours to win or lose!”

This resonated with both of us so much. We have a choice to get up and fight tomorrow. Whatever perspective you have about this, it’s yours. Dental professionals reading this should know, YOU ARE NOT ALONE! We all have those eye-popping days that leave us numb. There just aren’t as many people who talk or write about these. They write of joy and success. What I want you to know is that this is success. The fact that someone will read this and get back up and do it again tomorrow [with greater passion] is the reason I’ll continue to share it. For just that one!

It was me at one point and the DeW crew community folks like Anne Duffy, Melinda Heryford, Margy Schaller and Bete Johnson (to name only a few) picked me up and helped me get back on the road I’m destined to be on. 

Honestly, I deserve the space I’m in today only because it’s been a ton of work and frankly, I’ve earned it. I could never have dreamed that this business would be flourishing as it is today. As the dental spouse, I don’t have the luxury to walk away or text that I’m in need of “me” time. I will continue sharing these stories for the spouses and dental “day wives” that I hear from and who needed the message He puts in my head and my heart when my hands hit the keyboard.

It’s not about me, it’s about serving the DeW community and sharing with the intent to serve! Let’s continue to grow this community of supporters and stakeholders. For now, let’s celebrate each other and then let’s get up and DeW it again. Amen! 

See you on the road,